The Man Down The Hall
E Sam Parker

He must have had his reasons
just didn’t want to share
I’m sure there were people
he could’ve talked to,
some agency out there
He was always just around
but never really there,
that odd little man,
the man down the hall

Paper says his name was Jimmy
I always called him Fred
Sometimes he would speak
I can’t recall a word he said
there was always something
I needed to do instead
instead of talking
to the man down the hall

Who would have ever thought
surely no one could foresee
the paper said the man was dead
…they found a note
that just said
free
I wonder what that meant
I wonder indeed
about the man
the man down the hall

They say that he had lived here
for almost seven years
pictured with a moustache
I always thought he had a beard
an odd little man
that no one really feared
I wonder why he did it
the man down the hall

Damn, the forecast calls for rain
and I just washed my car
I see they finally signed that pitcher
a real true superstar
The markets up
well that’s good news
I thought for sure it’d fall
Too bad about old Fred
the man down the hall

    I won't try to explain the voices that helped create this collection, they come and
    go as they please.  I hope there is something that appeals to you...if not, please
    click on "Back to Homepage" and just forget this ever happened.


Its Been Good
e.samparker

As I look back upon my days
I’ve enjoyed the many ways
my life has gone from there to here
Although I don’t know where its going
I’ve truly enjoyed growing
and I’d like to make this one point
very clear
Its been good, life’s been good
Through the ups

and through the downs
through the squares

and pass arounds
through the lost

and through the founds
life’s been good
It’s been good

It hasn’t always been

a piece of cake
sometimes hurry,

sometimes  wait
sometimes it been heartache
and sometimes pain
Sometimes my fingers

have been burned
sometimes hard lessons

have been learned
but you know…I’d do it all again
It’s been good, yes, its been good

Its been good, not always great
Sometimes early, sometimes late
Sometimes luck, sometimes fate
but always times, oh what times

I’ve learned a little, forgot a lot
so very thankful for all I’ve got
enjoyed the haves,

and the have nots
yes, its been good
its been good

Through the thick

and through the thin
sometimes you lose,

sometimes you win
you find a lover,

you find a friend
you find a reason

Things keep changing everyday
some debts you owe
some, you just pay
We change faces along the way
just like the seasons

Through love and life,

until death
I choose to cherish

every breath
and try to live my life
the way I feel I should
treat others with respect
now and then, stop to reflect
thankful for life's many blessings
I tell ya, its been good

LESSONS
E. Sam Parker

I’m thankful for the life I’ve known
The fact I’ve learned and hopefully grown
I hope somehow that I have shown
That your lessons weren’t all wasted
We’d disagree from time to time
You had your way, I wanted mine
Easily lost, but easy to find
Thankful now, you kept me close
You kept me close, yet, let me run
Experienced mischief and childish fun
Never really hurting anyone
Another lesson learned
I learned a lot, enough to know
There’s so much more I’ll never know
But then I guess that’s how we grow
Yet another lesson learned
Now fully grown and on my own
Most wild oats, long since sewn
Learning more than I have shown
Another lesson learned
A teacher who never really taught
A wise man whose wisdom

was seldom sought
A rainbow chaser who never caught
the dream you were chasing
I too chase dreams and that’s okay
I wouldn’t want it any other way
When asked where I’m going,

with pride I say
I’m following my Father’s footsteps
I’ll follow you with love and pride
And lessons learned will be my guide
Though now you’re gone,

you’re still inside
My heart, my mind, my soul








In Memory of my Father
E.S. “Ted” Parker Jr

The Painting
E. Sam Parker

We painted you
with Honesty
and a true sense
of Caring
We painted you with Love
and an Openness for Sharing
We painted you with many colors
and a special sense of Pride
We painted you with Strength
and still a Tender side
You truly are a Work of Art
An Original by Design
You took the brush and added Heart
a Quick Wit an Open Mind
Though the paint’s not dried
know that we tried
and we’ll still add a touch or two
but we never dreamt we could paint
a Masterpiece like You







Dedicated to our daughter
Tina Louise Parker (Pendell)  

Coffee Cup
E Sam Parker

Staring in a coffee cup
caught up in a dream
watching my life swirl by
or perhaps it’s just the cream
There’s more to life than meets the eye
I think of when’s I think of whys
staring in a coffee cup
caught up in a dream

What ifs and maybes fill my plate
can’t help but think a bit too late
no, its not sour grapes
but spilt milk comes to mind
It’s been so long since I called home
wonder if they still think
how much I’ve grown
things sure look different
out on your own
Staring in a coffee cup
caught up in a dream

You can stare at your reflection
or look through the bottom of the cup
wonder which way is right
wonder which end is up
Sometimes in total silence
you can hear the loudest scream…
Staring in my coffee cup
caught up in a dream

You can wonder where you’re going
wonder where you’ve been
wonder if there’s reason
to go that way again
contemplate for hours
forgotten names
remembered friends
ask the waitress for the specials
see just what she recommends
it’s all so very simple
yet never what it seems
staring in a coffee cup
caught up in a dream

Every Time
(You Come To Mind)
e sam parker3

I still think of you every now and then…
Thoughts of long ago….of way back when
It warms my heart….deep within
…every time you come to mind

There’s a special place I keep you in
Reserved for lovers, reserved for friends
The line between them fades and blends
…every time you come to mind

*Every time you come to mind…
My heart…..stops…….for a moment
My world…….stops….for a moment
Every time…you come to mind

The world keeps right on turning
And life’s lessons I keep learning
And I still deal with the yearning
…every time …you come to mind

Domestic Bliss
E Sam Parker

She said “I Do” and so she has
for oh so many years
The prim and proper housewife
she hides so many tears
She lives the life of loving wife
though often feeling more like maid
She cooks, she cleans,
she does everything
and ponders the life she’s made
She married for love, a partnership
funny how things change
The sharing and the caring,
somehow now, rearranged
She chose this life, to be his wife
he was kind and understanding
Now, always at work…and always a jerk
he’s become so damn demanding
Where did he go, she’d liked to know
a true Jekyll and Mr Hyde
Feeling much like an amusement
an occasional carnival ride
She looks around his castle,
she’s the Queen of all of this
she gets to wash his clothes
and wipe his nose
The Queen of Domestic Bliss

Do You Think of Me
e. sam parker3

Do you think of me
like I think of you
Do you ever stop and wonder
about we two
Do you ever stop to think
about back then
Remembering us
remembering when
You come to mind
every now and then
and I think of you
yes, I think of you

Do you ever stop
and wonder why
Another place and time
another try
Was it me
or was it you
Do you think of me
like I think of you

Memories can make it special
Memories can make it sad
Embellishing all the good
dismissing the bad
On my mind, in my heart
wondering of you
Do you think of me
like I think of you

Memories often tend to fade
Disguising choices
and mistakes made
Mistake or choice,
a point of view
I made a choice regarding you
I made a choice, and mistake too
Do you think of me
like I think of you

Dreams and Recollections
e. sam parker3

Dreams and recollections
of days, and loves gone by
Is it best to remember
or best not to even try

Do you let it go, not block the flow
let memories float downstream
Or do you hold on tight,
embrace the night
and hope to God you dream

Dreams and recollections
often blessing, often curse
recalling, or forgetting,
which one is really worse
Remembering all the nows and thens
the use to be’s and could have beens
Once called lovers, now just friends…
It’s all a state of mind

A heavy sigh, a tear stained eye,
a thought of long ago
A look towards the future,
planted seeds begin to grow
You can’t go back,
and that’s a fact
no matter how you try
Dreams and recollections
of days, and loves gone by

Around The Bend
E Sam Parker

When you think you’ve had enough
and the road seems way too rough
on one thing, you can depend
There’s always something new
waiting just for you
waiting
up around the bend

The only thing that stays the same
is the fact that nothing does
Don’t get hung up on yesterdays
used to be and was
There’s always something growing
some things well worth  knowing
there
just up around the bend

* Up around the bend
old ends and new begins
a new perspective
a different point of view
hope and love abound
new beginnings can be found
there
up around the bend

Memories are needed things
and most should be treasured
But memories should never be
the stick by which you’re measured
Ya gotta jump into the water ……
to see if it’s deep…
Ya gotta clean out the closet
so you’ll know  what to keep

Learn from where you’ve been
and enjoy where you are going
There’s always something new
some things well worth knowing…
You won’t know where you’ve been
until you start going
going
up around the bend

Up Around The Bend
Written/Performed by Milan Christi
Lyrics by Sam Parker

Friends And So Much More
E. Sam Parker3

I think of you every now and then
remembering to way-back when
when love was easy
and we were friends
friends
and so much more

We were friends
and life was good
We did it all
because we could
because we wanted
not because we should
friends
and so much more

Childhood friends
boys to men
from girls to lovely ladies
From spin-the bottle
kiss and tell
To mortgages and babies

We used to dance and make romance
we'd laugh
howling at the moon
but that was then
then again
seems we grew up
way too soon

our lives were full of a thousand whys
mystic seas
Lucy in the skies
now well intentioned
but still white lies
friends
and so much more

Yesterdays
now separate ways
priorities began to shift
though heart to heart
we grew apart
still treasuring our special gift

Once a year
or maybe three
I’ll think of you
and you of me
It’s where my heart will always be
friends
and so much more

Hands of Time   
E. Sam Parker

We don't see eye to eye
but still see heart to heart
Our lives are different now
we've drifted far apart

You don't seem to understand me
and I say the same of you
we talk in circles now
afraid to speak the truth

You were my guiding light
you taught me right from wrong
A caring and gentle man
never weak, always strong

You've always been my hero
though never a superman
Your silent way of loving
took me years to understand

Now I wish I could turn back
the hands of time
To when I was your best friend
and you dear Dad were mine
Our lives are oh so different now
the truth, so hard to find
How I wish I could turn back
Turn back the hands of time

You seldom said I love you
though I could see it in your eyes
A man of dreams
of thoughts and things
who found peace in compromise

The years have changed us both
but the feeling's still remain
It's so hard to see the Son
when you're caught up in the rain

Hole In My Heart
E. Sam Parker

There’s a hole in my heart
where the pain comes in
I’m not sure how
I’m not sure when
The pain comes
every now and then
reminding me of you

A mother to a son
a bullet to a gun
words that can cut like a knife
Sometimes it’s more the things unsaid
that truly mold your life

What makes us care
when there’s no one there
when it’s just a state of mind
Like a bad disease
takes you to your knees
it can burn the eyes so blind

Thick as thieves
as trees to leaves
best friends
but, that was then
Lives sure change
rearrange
as we go from boys to men

Hearts and diamonds
boys and girls
Puppy dogs and little curls
Emotions really rule the world
or so it often seems

Reflections of days long past
winning a race when you finished last
Memories embellish slow to fast
too bad we feel the need

Sometimes I think of things I’ve done
and wonder if I’m the only one
Stories told  just for fun
become lies we hold as true

I’m not sure why I’m not sure when
I think of things every now and then
Thoughts of love and life
and long-gone friends
and the hole in my heart

Hole In My Heart
Written & Performed by Sam Parker

If You Only Knew Me
e. sam parker3

If you only knew me
wonder what you’d think
wonder if you’d like me
or pour me down the sink
Would I be the kind of person
that you’ve been looking for
or would you always be searching
for just a little more
if you only knew me

Could I make you happy
morning, noon and night
would I be the image in your mind
when we turned off the light
Would you be glad to see me
embracing the sunrise
could I hold your interest
intrigued by sweet surprise
if you only knew me

If you only knew me
if I really knew you
could we really be a couple
could we really be two
if you only knew me
if I only knew you

First impressions, shared confessions
crossing over the line
would you share your feelings
would you honor mine
If I made the first move
would you let me in
Could you care, would you dare
I wonder what you’d do
if you only knew me
if I only knew you

One hundred million questions
flashing through my mind
seeking out answers
so very hard to find
countless possibilities
wonder what you’d do
if you only knew me
if I only knew you
When Colors Fade
E Sam Parker

When the color fades
to shades of gray
Do the feelings fade

in the same way
Does the mind condone

the right to stray
When colors fade

Do you see the truth

through different eyes
Do you accept the use

of small white lies
Does truth become

more compromise
When colors fade

When passion’s red begins fade
Do you regret the choices

that you’ve made
Do you raise the bet

on cards you’ve played
or shuffle and redeal

Colors fade to black and white
Disguising wrong, disguising right
We mix regret with pure delight
When colors fade

Conviction becomes preferred choice
Commitment hears a different voice
Colors blend and start to fade
As we justify the choices made

When colors fade

Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda Been
E. Sam Parker3

Woulda, coulda, shoulda beens…
Invade my thoughts now and then
Things I did…or wish I’d done
…some life changing, some…just fun
Memories of lovers and of old friends
And those woulda, coulda, shoulda beens

Second guessing is itself a game
…reliving choices, diverting blame
Embellishing moments, enhancing tales
Small ponds to lakes, minnows to whales

Not sure why I feel the need
To open wounds and let them bleed
Rethink thoughts best left alone
Dig up skeletons and rattle bones

Funny how we recall life
A pin-prick now a bowie knife
A second-glance, a lover’s stare
Truth be told, no one cares

Those thoughts belong back in the past
Who cares if you finished first or last
Now is the only time to track
Nothing gained by looking back
Still, we go there…now and then
To those woulda, coulda, shoulda beens
Without You
E. Sam Parker

Been there by my side
right or wrong
We've shared the ups
and oh, the downs
So many times
you've made my heart smile
when all I wanted
was to frown
When I was too tired
you carried me
When I was too blind
thank God, you could see
I don't know where I'd be
or what I'd do
I'm not complete
without you

There's more to love
than meets the eye
There's more to knowing
than just asking why
sometimes true love
is worth
another try
Because there's more to love
than meets the eye

I want to spend my life
loving you
So thankful
for who you are
for what you do
You're the strength
that gets me through
I'm not complete
without you

Sometimes life
gets in the way
People, places
things we do and say
We face them together
each and every day
cause that's the only way
that's the only way

I want to spend my life
loving you
So thankful
for who you are
for what you do
You're the strength
that gets me through
I'm not complete
wiithout you







Without You
Written & Performed by Sam Parker
Original Materials by E. Sam Parker   
All Rights Reserved
Poetry, lyrics, brain farts...and other offerings....from the voices


Mysterious Ways
E. Sam Parker

He works in mysterious ways
It’s not for us to understand,
Excuse me for saying this
But that’s not who I am

I find no way, I can say
I truly do believe
In a God that allows such suffering
Without offering reprieve

I think of cancer and dementia
Birth defects and the mentally ill
Tell me again how I’m to pretend
Such suffering is God’s will

Where was God on 9-11
Why’d so many have to die
Where is God as we fight senseless wars
While the politicans lie

I truly want to understand
And I want so to believe
But too many questions fill my heart
And I’m not quite that naïve

I’m not trying to offend anyone
I respect the choice each person makes
I just wish I could believe
Mysterious ways aren’t just mistakes

I hope that there's a heaven
I pray for peaceful days
I know that there's a hell
And oh, those mysterious ways
We all have baggage...
how we handle it defines
who we are.
       esp3

Lady In The Corner
E Sam Parker

She’s a lady in the corner
and she’s not sure what to do
Cling to what she has
or reach out for something new
She’s always been a lady
but she’s wanting so much more
She wants to jump out of the window
she wants to run out of the door
For now, she’s in the corner
with a grip upon the floor
She’s a lady in the corner
but she’s wanting so much more

Like It Was yesterday
E Sam Parker

The touch – your embrace
The look upon your face
I remember…like it was yesterday

Things we used to do
The way it all seemed brand new
I remember…like it was yesterday

Like it was yesterday
Your memory warms my heart
Like it was yesterday
Though miles and miles apart
I remember
I remember…like it was yesterday

Days, months, years, tears
They come, they go, they flow
The thought of you stays on mind
I only hope you know
I remember…like it was yesterday
Like it was yesterday
I remember

My Mind
e.samparker

There’s a place I often go
the path to which, few people know
sometimes, I’m not so sure I know myself
A secret place of space and time
it’s not so much. but it’s all mine
it’s the one thing I don’t owe to someone else
my mind

When all else fades to shades of gray
it’s where I dance the night away
sometimes I know the words
sometimes I just hum
No one else can come inside
it’s where my inner thoughts reside
seldom shared they often hide
deep within my mind
my mind

Do you wonder what I’m thinking
I wonder what you’re thinking too
Ain’t it nice to have a secret
that’s only known by you

I can love…and I can hate
fantasize, anticipate
whatever I need, I’ve got
I can win…I can lose
I can bleed and I can bruise
it’s the only place I can be all that I’m not
my mind

Sometimes dark and sometimes distant
I can be a bit resistant
I know what I like
and then, don’t know a thing
Always searching for peace of mind
not really sure just where to find
it comes and goes
much like the night

Do you wonder what I’m thinking
I wonder what you’re thinking too
Ain’t it nice to have a secret
that’s only known by you
in a world of contradiction
facing mental crucifixion
I don’t have a hammer
but own plenty of nails

Not Sure I’d Want To Try
E Sam Parker

He wonders what she’d think
wonders what she’d do
If she ever found out
if she ever knew
She’s been his only lover
well, that’s not entirely true
He wonders what she’d think
wonders what she’d do

If before I met you
should it matter what I did
The lost and found, passed around
antics of a kid
If I dared, if I shared
would you prefer I’d kept it hid
I wonder what you’d really think
if you knew just what I did

Moments from the past
return now and then
recalling precious moments
of lovers and of friends
Feelings we once shared
may never come again
but some moments from the past
return now and then

I can’t change who I was
not sure I’d want to try
Is not telling you the whole truth
really living with a lie
Some things I’ve done, for love or fun
are not a part of you and I
I can’t change who I was
I’m not sure I’d want to try

On The Back Nine
esamparker3

I still like to hit em,
they just don’t go as far
I don’t do a lot of walking
I usually ride in a cart
Not quite what I once was….
but doing just fine
I’m not over the hill
I’m just on the back nine

I still like to swing
and I still love to play
and I’d still like to do it
every single day
Now days I pace myself
I don’t rush through it
I’ve learned to appreciate the fact
that I can still do it

I keep my eye on the ball
though at times a bit blurry
I’ve learned to pace myself
I don’t  get in a hurry
I don’t get too upset
now days I unwind
I’m not over the hill
I’m on the back nine

I’m on the back nine
and that’s just fine
I’m enjoying life
and taking my time
Some say I’m  over the hill
and on the decline
Well I’m just making the turn
I’m on the back nine

I still carry a big stick
and I still like to use it
I still like to stroke
I just no longer abuse it
I let others play their own games
I’m happy with mine
I’m not over the hill
I’m just on the back nine

I’ve got a good putter
and I’ve got a stroke
I don’t often rush it
I’m smooth, I don’t poke
I’ve mellowed in my old age
I’m more in control
But I still love the feeling
when I get in the hole

Sometimes I slice
sometimes I hook
Sometimes I forget
just how many strokes I took
If I play with yours
you can play with mine
No, I’m not over the hill
I’m just on the back nine.

I’m on the back nine
and that’s just fine
I’m enjoying life
and taking my time
Some say I’m  over the hill
and on the decline
Well I’m just making the turn
I’m on the back nine

I’m on the back nine
and life is good
I try to keep it in play
and stay out of the woods
there’s days when I shimmer
and days when I shine
I’m not over the hill
I’m just on the back nine.

PAGES
E  Sam Parker

She sits alone and ponders
Her thoughts reflecting years gone by
Recalling choices she has made
Though now, not quite sure why

Her dreams and her priorities
Rearranged—but then, that’s life
Now she’s a loving Mother
Now, a devoted wife

A devoted wife, no question
Yet questions fill her mind
Daydreams and fantasy
Help her pass the time

She loves her life and her children
Loves her husband too
And yet, if she could do it all again
Sometimes wonders what she’d do

Second-guessing, not confessing
Thoughts that sometimes fill her mind
She wonders just what she do
If she could turn back the hands of time

If she could rewrite her life’s story
What tales would she  pen
Would she change it all, or just recall
And do it all again

We know the grass isn’t always greener
More so just another shade of green
Still we crave the mystery
Of the pages never seen

We all ponder the pages
Of the stories only dreamed

Prisoner of Love
E Sam Parker

She’s faithful and committed
though she sometimes wonders why
But she’d never raise the issue
least not eye to eye
Her wings were clipped
her freedom stripped,
he’s a most possessive man
She loves him, she truly loves him
but he’s so hard to understand
She wants to love him with all her heart
but he just won’t let her in
She stays on call…just down the hall
summoned, now and then
It’s not that he doesn’t love her
he loves as best he can
He was raised to show no weakness
he was raised to be a man
A man, just like his father
and his father before that
A man shows no real emotion
problems, kept beneath his hat
It was how he had always been
she thought, once married, he’d let her in
He’d started to, now and then
but remembered his upbringing
She would settle for his devotion
it was what he had to give
It wasn’t how she wanted it
but it was how she chose to live
A prisoner in a sense
her hands, tied behind her tight
He’d probably never ever change
but she hoped someday, he might
she hoped someday he might

Recollection
E. Sam Parker3

Woulda, coulda, shoulda beens…
Invade my thoughts now and then
Things I did…or wish I’d done
…some life changing, some…just fun
Memories of lovers and of friends
And woulda, coulda, shoulda beens

Second guessing is itself a game
…reliving choices, diverting blame
Embellishing moments, enhancing tales
Small ponds to lakes, minnows to whales

Not sure why I feel the need
To open wounds and let them bleed
Rethink thoughts best left alone
Dig up skeletons and rattle bones

Funny how we recall life
A pin-prick now a bowie knife
A second-glance, a lover’s stare
Truth be told, no one cares

Those thoughts belong back in the past
Who cares if you finished first or last
Now is the only time to track
Nothing gained by looking back
Still, we go there…now and then
With woulda, coulda, shoulda beens

SECRETS
E. Sam Parker

We all have secrets
things better off not shared
Things that would alter friendships
if you ever dared
It’s not that you’re so different
some things are better off not shared
Some secrets are for keeping
some should not be shared

Not really on the dark side
but surely shades of gray
You wonder if  they’d really care
would they turn away
If you ever shared your secrets
what would they really say
Some secrets are for keeping
regardless of what they say

Oh you can tell me, it’s okay,
after all, I’m your best friend
If you want to feel without
simply let them feel within

Some secrets are for Keeping
accept it and move on
Some secrets are for keeping
and some make friendships…
gone

Remembering
E.Sam Parker  

Remembering a moment
A very special time
I was in your heart
You were so in mine
Our bodies seemed a perfect fit
Beyond verse and rhyme
Remembering a moment
A very special time

You touched me
how you touched me
I thank you for your touch
Touching without words
Yet saying oh so much

Shades of Gray
e sam parker

It’s not always so simple
sad to say, but true
Sometimes the right choice
depends on right for you
Sometimes there’s no direction
you have to choose your own way
Sometimes , all you have
are shades of gray

Shades of gray blur the edges
that blend from black to white
They cover up the difference
between wrong and right
Stop and go, yes and no
often fade clear out of sight
and all that’s left
are shades of gray

Liars and lovers
look the same beneath the covers
But in the morning light
true colors start to show
Passion red goes to your head
as true blue fades away
and all that’s left
are shades of gray

Shades of gray, shades of gray….
All that’s left
are shades of gray


Shades of Gray
Written & Performed by Sam Parker

Third Cup Of Coffee
E Sam Parker

It’s my third cup of coffee
and I’ve really got a buzz
started thinking about days gone by
used to be’s and was
if ya ask me why I do it
I’d have to say because
it’s my third cup of coffee

It’s my third cup of coffee
it doesn’t need to make much sense
Not everything has to be so deep
it doesn’t have to be intense
Sometimes you just wanna go out there
and straddle the fence
with that third cup of coffee

* It doesn’t always have to be
about me or you
sometimes nothing is just fine
Sometimes all you should worry about
is cream and sugar
with or without
and that third cup of coffee
yeah, that third cup of coffee
that’s enough

It’s my third cup of coffee
taking time to breathe
I’ve got nothing under my hat
got nothing up my sleeve
I don’t really have a position
it doesn’t matter what I believe
I’ve got my third cup of coffee
I’m alright
I’ve got my third cup of coffee
I’m alright

Let It Go
e. sam parker3

Caught up in tug of war
remembering childhood things
Can’t seem to find the peace of mind
adulthood’s supposed to bring
I still try to slay the dragons
I still try to scale the wall
I still want to be the hero
standing 10 feet tall
I need to let it go
need to let it go

I need to let go of the demons
need to let go of the pain
Need to step into the sunshine
come in from rain
Need to change out of my wet clothes
put on something dry
Stop searching for reasons
stop looking for whys
I need to let it go
need to let it go

Let it go if it’s not helping
let it go as best you can
Some things in this life
we will never understand
Some times you’ve just got to
let it go

We’ve all got our closets
our crosses to bear
We’ve all got dark secrets
we’ve all got our share
We’ve all got questions
a thousand times asked
Sometimes the best answer
is to leave it in the past
Let it go
just let it go

It’s Me
e.samparker

What makes you think  
you’re so special
thinking the world

revolves around you
what makes you think.....

you really matter
who cares ........

what you say or do
well I hope that you can see…

it’s me
It's me
Who’s gonna be there

when you need him
who’s gonna help you to be strong
who’s gonna hold you

when you’re lonely
who’s gonna love you

all life long
well, I hope you can see…it’s me
It's me
* I’ll be the one who

stands beside you
I’ll be the one

who really cares
I’ll be the one you

can depend on
I’ll be the one who’s

always there

It’s me who’s always

gonna want you
it’s me who’s always

gonna say
I love, I want you... I need you
forever, and ever.. and a day
I hope that you can see
if there’s one man

right for you
it’s me, darling, It's me


I'm Trying
E. Sam Parker








When my daddy said goodbye
it made my mommy cry
She started crying again today
Two men came to the door
I’d never seen those uniforms before
They weren’t like the one daddy wore
when he went away

Mommy sent me out to play
And when the two men drove away
I went back in
Mommy looked like she’d been crying
I’m not sure what was wrong
Mommy said we must be strong
I’m not sure why, but for Mommy
I’m trying  

Window Pain
esamparker3

She stares out her window
at the clouds and the rain
She tries to hide her heartache
tries to hide her pain
This wasn’t how she had pictured it
those many years ago
This wasn’t how she’d dreamt it
how she thought her life would go









A princess in her younger days
who grew into a queen
She was a wife, she had a family
she shared her castle with her king
The king became a jester,
his humor no longer enjoyed
The love became dead weight
and she became annoyed

The children grown and on their own
she left her would-be king
For she had dreamt of a better life
she envisioned better things

Those days now so long ago
she looks back between the tears
And wonders of the choices made
back so many years
Her prince charming never found her
just another jester now and then
Her heart hardened from the pain of love
from the pain of just pretend

Now alone, so all alone
the years all slipping by
She sits staring out her window
looking for the reason why

WishIwas
e.samparker

Do ya ever stop to wonder
just who writes the songs
that make ya feel so happy
ya just wanna sing along
or the kind that tell of a love
a love that’s just gone wrong
do ya ever stop and wonder
who writes the songs

What gives a person inspiration
where do they get that creativity
when God was passing out the talent
I wonder why he didn’t leave
a little bit for me

I wanna be a famous rock-n-roll singer
drive around in a big fancy limousine
have lots of pretty women
wanting to know me
fellas,
you know exactly what I mean

But here I am now in my ....sixties
and I’ve lost most of my hair
I’d still love to love the ladies
but they just don’t seem to care

An original kind of fella
I think I’m rather smart
all I needed was a break
an open door, a place to start
I could’ve been a big star
if the world gave me half a chance
I’m just a fella who loves music
but never learned to dance

Just a fella who loves music
two or three bricks short of a load
I’m like the interstate highway
minus the road
a very peculiar person
or so I’ve been told
a wishIwas  daydreamer
not too famous, just too old

WOULD YOU
E. Sam Parker

If I wrote the words
would my voice be heard
would you try to understand
Would you see me for what I am
more than just a man

If I wrote the words that I feel inside
could you see beyond the print
Could you understand who I really am
understand what I really meant

Could you feel the depth,
would you take the time
would you really want to know
Would you ponder on the meaning
or simply let it go

Would you feel it
Could you feel it
Would you take the time to try
I wonder if you would
and then, I wonder why

Sorry
E. Sam Parker

On the desk was lay a piece of paper
and an old ball-point pen
He would sit and stare for hours
at them every now and then
He’d stare right through the paper
and the one word written there
Sorry was the word,
sorry was the stare

He often thought he’d found the words,
thought he knew just what to say
Then he’d sit down at the desk
and the words would fly away
Putting down the pen and paper,
tomorrow’s another day
He’d sit staring at the one word
that he knew he had to say
sorry

Sorry was the only word
that ever came to mind
He was sorry, truly sorry
but simply could not find the time
No time to ponder
just the right words to say
He’d think a bit, he’d get back to it,
tomorrow’s another day

Another day came and went,
many, many times
The church bells in the distance
rang a haunting chime
Now too late to make amends,
too late, all out of time
He sat staring at the one word
now forever on his mind
sorry

T U R N S
E. Sam Parker

There are turns that we make
Directions we take
And detours along the way
Some roads are narrow
Some straight as an arrow
And some only go one way

Some enjoy travel
Some truly unravel
Some simply haven’t a clue
Some like to steer
Some sit in the rear
While others just take in the view

I like to drive
I feel so alive
When I’m behind the wheel
I choose my direction
Make my selection
It’s then that I feel real

I don’t follow well
You can probably tell
A lesson I chose not to learn
I don’t mind taking chances
Enjoy the fire dances
Although I’m occasionally burned

When you dance in the fire
The flames get much higher
I gain pleasure when on the hot seat
I enjoy the race
Enjoy the fast pace
I’m happiest when I compete

I don’t need to beat you
My opponent is me
A very good lesson to learn
I give it my best
That’s my only test
The proof, the direction I turn


In The Dark of Night
E. Sam Parker

For a second
she was back there
and her world, again at peace
The fussing and the fighting
magically had ceased
For a moment, it was as if
all was really right
and then, just as quickly
it vanished with the light

it all vanished with the light
A small lamp on the nightstand
but still enough to see
This wasn’t what she wanted
or where she wished to be

In the dark of night
wrong or right
is just a state of mind
So much easier to pretend
love is really blind
With eyes wide shut
and a wishful heart
we prefer to dim the light
Things look so much better
in the dark of the night

In the light of day
we turn away
some, turn the other cheek
The truth, so hard to find
when the voice
chooses not to speak
We play the game
it’s such a shame
losing sight of wrong and right
Preferring to enjoy the view
seen in the dark of night

Bullet On The Table
E. Sam Parker

There’s a bullet on the table
A gun is in his hand
He’s had all that he can handle
Much more than he can stand
He’s thinking about the moment
Formulating his plan
For the bullet on the table
For the gun that’s in his hand

Is this to be how it all will end
Alone without, alone within
Without a lover, without a friend
Staring at the bullet on the table

High expectations
Stressed out to the max
It’s not ability that is missing
But confidence he lacks
His train has pulled out
And he’s laid down on the tracks
Staring at the bullet on the table

Is this to be, how it all will end
Alone without, alone within
Without a lover, without a friend
Staring at the bullet on the table

We’ve all held the bullet
We’ve all taken aim
Some aim to please
Some just point the blame
Some spend their whole life
Caught up in the game
Staring at the bullet on the table

Sister  
E. Sam Parker

I love you, but I don’t know you
It’s strange to say, but true
I was raised an only child
And then one day, came you
Fifteen years separate us
In ways, so many more
I love you, but I don’t know you
Closed minds,
closed hearts,
closed doors

The same Mother and Father
Yet not the same at all
I was raised very large
You, so very small
They gave us both their everything
Indeed, they gave their all
The same Mother and Father
Yet not the same at all

I got out and moved about
You, they held too tight
It wasn’t really wrong
But it really wasn’t right

Never a chance to take a stance
Your decisions all were made
Perhaps with good intentions
Your thoughts, your life were swayed

When I look back, I have to think
The steepest price was paid
By you, because they loved you
Because your thoughts,
your life, were swayed

In the name of love, they protected you
But they protected you too much
They kept you out of trouble
They kept you out of touch

Choices that should have been given you
Were decisions too often made
In an effort to protect you,
Your thoughts, your life were swayed

Somewhere along the road of life
Ties were cut by mother’s knife
Sharp words and silence,
like tempered steel
Cut deeper than
I thought my heart could feel

The truth became much less than known
Our house much less than I called home
We grew apart, we grew alone
We grew with much regret

I do regret so much of then
And wish we could go back to when
But that would all be just pretend
And at last I’m through pretending

Walls that were built now crumble down
Truth is there, just look around
What once was lost, we’ve finally found
It’s never, never too late

We lost so much, and yet I know
With time and love, the bond will grow
There’s still so much I’ll never know
But now, at least we’ll learn

I’ll learn of you, and you of me
Thankful for the opportunity
To get to know who you’ve come to be
The Sister in my life

It’s never too late









To Rhonda with love

Somewhere    
Down
The Road
e. sam parker

Somewhere down the road
I’ll find what I am after
I’ll embrace the chase
slow down the pace
pausing for the laughter  
I’ll take in the view
enjoying old and new
and appreciate the years
The blood and sweat
and not forget
the endless flow of tears
Somewhere down the road
countless miles ahead
no more second thoughts
of what I should have done instead
I’ll find true balance
and lasting peace
all my worrying will finally cease
I’ll lay down my heavy load
somewhere down the road
    

The Man Within
E. Sam Parker

He stares like I should know him
sometimes looking right through me
A reflection of someone I think I am
or hope to be
Though just a mirrored image
perhaps the better part of me
This image in the mirror
the reflection that I see

I see his face is wrinkled
and his hair is getting thin
But deep inside I still see
that youthful boyish grin
The younger me, I only see
every now and then
Every now and then
when I look into the mirror

*Now and then he’s my best friend
my one true confidant
Reminding me that what I see
is sometimes what I want
I choose to see the better me
but every now and then
I see deep into the mirror
deep into the man within

This man has many secrets
secrets best unshared
Afraid of the reception
and perception
if he ever dared
Afraid that if he opened up
he’d lose his every friend
Afraid no one would love him
if they knew the man within

Deep inside, he’s a good man
least he really tries to be
But there are certain things about him
he’d prefer no one ever see
The envy, and the bitterness,
the deceit and bigotry
All these things he tries to hide
from the man he wants to be

We all have many secrets
we all have a secret side
Certain things are better off
locked up deep inside
The deeper, the better
out of public view
Within the man inside of me
and the one inside of you

Unsaid
E. Sam Parker  

I stood looking in the mirror
counting up the wasted years
Thinking back on all the things
I should have said
Fighting back the flood of tears
oh, the tears

Words of anger spoke so quickly
lasting for so long
Who's to blame, no one remembers
it went beyond right or wrong
it went too long

I wish that I could tell you
all the things I never said
So much has gone unspoken
so much has gone unsaid
it goes unsaid

Now there's no time left for sorries
no time left for good-byes
No time left to make up
no time for one more try
wish we could try

Did you know how much I love you
did you know how much I care
Did you know deep in my heart
you were always standing there
you stood right there

And I wish that I could tell you
all the things I never said
So much has gone unspoken
so much has gone unsaid
it goes unsaid

You never cared that much for flowers
but its something I must do
A token remembrance
of the love that I once knew

And I wish that I could tell you
all the things I never said
So much has gone unspoken
so much has gone unsaid
it goes unsaid

It goes unsaid

In Memory of my Father
Ernest S. “Ted” Parker Jr.
So much went unsaid

You Take Me There
E Sam Parker

I wish that I could find the words
but words just aren’t enough
you’ve stood right beside me
through the good times and the rough
You know that I’m not perfect…
…and still…that’s enough
you take me there…
you take me there

You take me to a special place
I’ve never been before
Where everyday is a special day
and all I want is more
…more time to be beside you
more time to show I care
you take me there
you take me there

*
You take me to heart
You take me to love
You’ve shown me a world
I’ve only dreamt of
You’ve opened up my eyes
taught me love, taught me to care
You take me there…
You take me there

Words cannot do justice
to what I feel inside
You’ve shown me love and passion
You’ve filled my heart with pride
I know that there’s a heaven
…a place true lovers share
…cause you take me there
you take me there

YOU
E Sam Parker

It doesn’t seem to matter
where I am or what I do
I’m forever drawn
to the loving thought of you
You’re with me morning, noon and night
indeed, the whole day through
I’m caught up in the memory
the memory of you
you

Too much to understand
too much to comprehend
so much more than inspiration
so much more than just a friend
somewhere down the road
I hope I see your face again
I’m caught up in your memory
your memory, till then

You changed my way of thinking
you opened up my eyes
Still a thousand questions
and tear-stained alibis
We may never know the reasons
we may never know the whys
A heart that doesn’t love
is a heart that surely dies

For too many years I let you go
now, with deep regret
Lost moments, precious moments
forever gone and yet
I treasure all the memories
and vow never to forget
Although I knew you all that time
I’m glad we finally met
I’m thankful for the memories
my memories of you

Back of the Bus
E. Sam Parker

When I was young,
it’s where we’d go
so the driver couldn’t see
Thinking we were cool
acting a fool…
I was young, white and free

I didn’t know of segregation
I couldn’t understand the fuss
How could blacks complain
about the back end of the bus

I still can’t tuly comprehend
just how it was for blacks back then
Separate bathrooms, separate bars,
food served out of separate jars
Separate counters, separate schools
hatred born and bred by fools

My father’s father, his father too
sadly shared this point of view
They taught their daughters and their sons
that whites were indeed the chosen ones
Ignorance breeds ignorance
but that stops here








I won’t be a part of the ignorance and fear

Direction
E. Sam Parker

If I told you, If I dared to
I wonder what you’d say
Would you embrace me
could you face me
or would you turn and walk away
Some things are better left unknown
Some sides are better never shown
Some rocks are better never thrown
Glass houses, best left empty

Paths that cross and paths that bend
Some paths never cross again
We discard lovers, we forget friends
As we move on down the road

Some roads are made to travel fast
Some with caution, you dare not pass
Some built with pride and made to last
Still others seldom taken

We choose our path, though some say no
We choose to stop, we choose to go
We set the speed from fast to slow
But more importantly,
direction

Scars That Won’t Heal
E. Sam Parker

I keep looking in the mirror
hoping someday not to see
the reflection of this man
looking back at me
I try to hide the hurt
try to hide the way I feel
but, some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal

I’ve tried my very best to hide
the emptiness I’ve felt
And I must confess
I’ve done my best
to play my hand as dealt
I can hide the tears
so many tears
but the pain is oh so real
Some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal

Some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal
You try to hide
the pain inside
try to hide the way you feel
Too many tears
too many years
the feeling all too real
Some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal

It feels like only yesterday
though it’s been a long, long time
A child worshiping his hero
and you dear Dad were mine
I looked up to you
and I still do
in my heart
in my mind
It feels like only yesterday
though it’s been a long, long time

Now you’re gone
and I’ve moved on
at least I’m trying to
But truth be known
when I’m alone
thoughts often turn to you
I wanted just to tell you
exactly how I feel, but
some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal
yes,
Some hurt is forever
and some scars never heal

The Damnedest Things
E Sam Parker

It came as quite a shock
everyone was surprised
no one could see it coming on
They were two
just like me and you
turn around and now, their gone

The paper said she put
the gun up to his head
and as he slept,
she pulled the trigger
Sometimes things just aren’t
quite what they seem
Sometimes, there’s just no way to figure
people do the damnedest things
the damnedest things

He died in his sleep,
I wonder if he was dreaming
wonder what was the last thing on his mind
She then took a knife
slit her wrists, took her on life
she left a note that just said,
“now everything is fine”
people do the damnedest things
the damnedest things

You never know how it comes
or when it goes
We only think we have a clue
Just around the corner
just over the hill
it could be me, it could be you
people do the damnedest things
the damnedest things

  

You Take Me There        
E Sam Parker        

I wish that I could find the words
but words just aren’t enough
you’ve stood right beside me
through the good times and the rough
You know that I’m not perfect
and still that’s enough
you take me there
you take me there

You take me to a special place
I’ve never been before
Where everyday is a special day
and all I want is more
more time to be beside you
more time to show I care
you take me there
you take me there

You take me to heart
You take me to love
You’ve shown me a world
I’ve only dreamt of
You’ve opened up my eyes
taught me love, taught me to care
You take me there
You take me there

Words can not do justice
to what I feel inside
You’ve shown me love and passion
You’ve filled my heart with pride
I know that there’s a heaven
a place true lovers share
cause you take me there
you take me there

Dirty Old Man
E. Sam Parker

Every now and then
I still think back to when
and it puts a smile on my face
A real rock-n-roller, a midnight stroller
I ran a much faster race
Now I don’t run quite so fast
my motors slowed and I’m low on gas
eye-ballin ladies as they walk past
and think of things I used to do
I’m just a dirty old man
a dirty old man

I still do some drinkin’
eyeballin and winkin
I love long legs and short, short skirts
Blondes, brunettes and redheads
Tennie bops and dead-heads
trashy women who love to flirt
I may not be all that I used to be
But I damn sure enjoy my fantasies
I know there’s lots of guys just like me
I’m just a dirty old man

I’m a dirty old man and that’s okay
I wouldn’t want it any other way
I still love the ladies, love to have a good time
If not in person, at least in my mind

Well, my hair’s getting thinner….
And I don’t miss many dinners
I can’t stay up and party all night
Can’t go from dusk till dawn
but please don’t get me wrong
I’ll go until I get you right
You can think what you want
think what you will
Call me an old man
call me over the hill
I still like to have a real good time
if not in person
well at least in my mind
I’m just a dirty old man
just a dirty old man

Dirty Old Man
Music Written & Performed by Milan Christi
Vocals & Lyrics by Sam Parker

LETTER HOME
E. Sam Parker  
12 March 1984
SLOW  (D, Dmaj7, G, A / D7,G, A)

HELLO DARLING.....,
JUST A FEW LINES TO SAY I LOVE YOU
GOD KNOWS HOW MUCH I MISS YOU....
THINKING OF YOU ALL THE TIME.

THERE IS SO MUCH...
THAT I’M LONGING JUST TO TELL YOU...
BUT I DON’T KNOW HOW TO TELL YOU..
AH WOMAN JUST HOW I FEEL

YOU KNOW IT’S HARD TO SAY I LOVE YOU
IN MERE WORDS OF BLACK AND WHITE...
WHEN I’M LONGING JUST TO HOLD YOU...
AND MAKE LOVE WITH YOU TONIGHT

lead break

GIRL, I LOVE YOU...
WITH A LOVE THAT WILL LAST FOREVER
AND LOVE, YOU KNOW FOREVER...
IS A LONG, LONG TIME

YOU KNOW IT’S HARD TO SAY I LOVE YOU
IN MERE WORDS OF BLACK AND WHITE...
WHEN I’M LONGING JUST TO HOLD YOU...
AND MAKE LOVE WITH YOU TONIGHT

...YES, I’M LONGING JUST TO HOLD YOU...
AND MAKE LOVE WITH YOU TONIGHT

Letter Home
Written & Vocals by Sam Parker
Music Performed by Milan Christi

Hi-de Blow   
E. Sam Parker
(Jive Tempo/176   G/C/D)

There’s a little club called the Dew-Drop Inn
…I like to go there every now and then
They got a cat in there

that really puts on a show
She wets her lips as the crowd yells

….hi-de-blow
(hi-de-blow)
And she blows….
sax>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sax

Hi-de blows and that’s a fact….
this chic can really gives good sax….
She blows…………man she blows….
the crowd just love to yell hi-de blow
(hi-de blow)
sax>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sax


Well, someone stood up and they yelled
hi-de-blow….(hi-de blow)
…someone stood up and they
yelled hi-de-blow….(hi-de blow)
The crowd gathered round
just to watch her blow
sax>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sax

There’s just something about a chic
that really knows how to blow….
When you find that kind of women,
ya never want to let her go….
Ya just thank your lucky stars …
and yell hi-de blow (hi-de blow)
sax>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>sax

hi-de-blow….(hi-de blow)
….. hi-de-blow….(hi-de blow)

Heidi Blow
Written & Performed by Sam Parker

Living With Why
E. Sam Parker
(3-chord Blues)

So many question
no answer in sight
Wide-eyed,
staring through the dark of the night
Lines in the sand, walls built up high
Too late for answers, living with why

It’s the same old question
again, and again
I can’t let it go, it lives deep within
so deep within
It’s the same old question
with the same old end

*Why….please tell me why
Why….I need to know why
Questions with no answers…
Living with why

Let it go—my friends tell me—
…and I know that they’re right
Still I search for an answer
night after night
Living with why….just living with why

I’ll keep asking the question
till the day that I die

*Why….please tell me why
Why….I need to know why
Questions with no answers…
Living with why

Living on whys….

I Was Cool…Once
E. Sam Parker

Once upon a time…
well at least in my mind….
I was cool once
I was the guy to be…
all the ladies wanted me…
cuz I was cool once
That’s how I remember it…
but it’s been a long, long time
I was really cool….
well at least in my own mind….
I was cool once, yeah…

I was cool once

I was the guy who played it cool……
I was the stud of my high school…
yeah, I was cool once
I was the captain of the team….
I was every girl’s dream…
yeah, I was cool once
Now, those days seem

so very long ago…..
n-I have to remind my friends…
cuz they  don’t seem to know
I was cool once…………
yeah, I was cool once…….

I was so cool

*I was really cool…
way back when I was in school—
yeah, I was cool…once
I was all of that and then some…
I had hair…and I was handsome…
I was cool—once (so cool)

I’m not sure quite what happened…
I’ve changed along the way
But let me tell you something…
way back in the day…….
I was cool one….
yeah, I was cool once.


Memory Lane
E. Sam Parker


He pops a top…
and puts his feet up…
remembering the days
when he thought himself special…
in oh so many ways
…a big man on campus….
everyone knew his name
now he looks in the mirror…
and thinks it’s all a shame

…it’s just not fair……...
some guys have all the luck
he’s passing the blame…..
and passing the buck
there’s always a reason……
someone else to blame…
stuck in the slow lane…
and all you're passing…
is the blame

When she was 19….
she was so pretty……
she had the whole world at her feet
all the guys would stop and stare
when she walked down the street
now the only things she likes to do…
is remember when…and eat
because she used to be so pretty…
she had the whole world at her feet

…it’s just not fair……...
some girls have all the luck
she’s passing the blame…..
and passing the buck
there’s always a good reason……
someone/something  to blame…
stuck in the slow lane…
and all your passing…
is the blame

Memories are a roadmap…
to show you where you’ve been
it’s nice to good back and visit….
every now and then
it would be kinda funny…
if it wasn’t so damn sad….
to think the best times of your life…
are the ones already had

You’ve got to….get up….get on with it…
look ahead…not behind
stop living in the past…
you’ll be surprised what you might find
there’s a whole world waitting for you…
let the future be your game
stop living in the past…
move away from memory lane

"T" FOR TINA
E. Sam Parker
06/24/ 1982
(last verse rewritten 03/23/97)
BALLAD (D, F#m, G, A  / * G, D, D7,  A)

SHE'S SUNSHINE AND BLUE SKIES
SO FULL OF QUESTIONS
ABOUT WHAT'S AND WHY'S
EVERY DAYS A  NEW SURPRISE -
AND A LOT OF JOY

THE IMAGE OF HER MOTHER
AND YOU KNOW THAT'S FINE
IT TAKES GOOD GRAPES
TO MAKE A REAL FINE WINE
I'M PROUD TO SAY

THE CHILD IS MINE
GOD KNOWS I LOVE HER SO

*AND IT'S
T FOR TEXAS -
AND T FOR TENNESSEE  
T STANDS FOR  TINA -
AND  THAT'S THE T FOR ME  

WISH I COULD FIND THE WORDS
THAT COULD FULLY EXPRESS
THIS FEELING OF WARMTH
AND OF HAPPINESS
SHE'S MADE THE WORLD

A BETTER PLACE
FOR HER MOM AND ME

CONCEIVED IN LOVE
AND RAISED WITH CARE
WITH A SPARKLE IN HER EYES -
A TOUCH OF GOLD IN HER HAIR
THE CUTEST LITTLE SMILE

ANYWHERE
THAT'S MY LITTLE GIRL

*AND IT'S
T FOR TEXAS -
AND T FOR TENNESSEE  
T STANDS FOR  TINA -
AND  THAT'S THE  T FOR ME  
SHE'S THE IMAGE OF HER MOTHER
AND YOU KNOW THAT'S FINE
CAUSE IT TAKES GOOD GRAPES
TO MAKE A REAL FINE WINE
I'M PROUD TO SAY THAT

THE CHILD IS MINE
GOD KNOWS I LOVE HER SO

LEAD BREAK

AND NOW SHE’S A WOMAN....
I STILL SEE THE LOVE

WITHIN HER EYES...,
A LOVING HEART...
FULL OF SWEET SURPRISE..
A WOMAN READY...

FOR THE WORLD
I THANK GOD

SHE’S STILL DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL
SHE’LL ALWAYS BE
DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL

T for Tina
Written & Vocals by Sam Parker
Music Performed by Milan Christi


I WONDER
E. Sam Parker

Sometimes, every now and then
I think back to way back when
remembering things, and then again
I wonder

I wonder if I still recall
the way it really was at all
or if it was all so very small
and just not worth remembering

Did I make it up
was it really real
Did I know enough
to know to feel
Was it really me
what was the deal
sometimes I have to wonder

The older I get
                 the better it was                       
the bigger the fish
the more righteous the cause
but now and then I stop to pause
and wonder...
I wonder

We called it love, but then again
we were so young, way back when
a loving smile, or just a grin
sometimes I have to wonder

We knew so much
but was that true
did you know me, did I know you
what was it we were gonna do
when we grew up.... I wonder

hmmm, I wonder

DAD                   
E. Sam Parker                             

I miss you Dad,                      
the times we had                       
and the times                            
we never shared                     
Waters raged beneath our bridge
still I knew how much you cared
Life got complicated
communication all but ceased
We both had our demons
you, the larger beast
Lines in the sand,
we both took stands
both in places we belong
Sadly separated
two rights that were so wrong
Opportunities passed us by
I’ll never truly know just why
Still to this day, sometimes I cry
over answers I’ll never know
God damn pride for all it’s worth
lessons taught from day of birth
Lines we drew, walls we built
years of wondering, pondering guilt
Family ties, worn like a noose
strangling those who did not cut loose
Cut loose suggests that one was free
that wasn’t true, least not for me
I could not escape the guilt and pain
it filled my heart, it burnt my brain
It spread like poison, crippling the soul
unnoticed by most, it took its toll
I’ve cried myself beyond the tears
and learned to live with the pain
There are no answers to be had
only redirecting blame
But blame is not the issue
nor has it ever been
Dad, you are the one place
I can never go again
I miss you Dad, the times we had
and the times we never shared.
I miss you Dad

CLICK
E. Sam Parker

One out of six—click, one out of five
One of us won’t leave this table alive
One of us won’t have to worry no more
Click, sigh, one out of four

I can’t recall just why we are here
A case of honor, a case of beer
We neither one blink, we show no fear
I just can’t recall why we are here

There’s one bullet to contend with
Did I dare you or you dare me
Only one bullet—click,
Now, one chance in three

One chance in three
is it you or me
If I quit now, what would you do
I don’t want to play
don’t want to die today
Click, …one chance in two

Oh my God, we’ve taken this to the edge
We’re on top of the world,
standing out on the ledge
With one more pull,
our fate will be known
One will walk away
one mind will be blown
This is so silly,
it’s taken on a life of its own…
Click

My Dog
e.samparker













Buddy is his name
He is as name implies
He can’t really change the world
But the little guy sure tries
When his happy meter’s wagging
It just warms me up inside
He can’t really change the world
But at least my Buddy tries

Solitude
E. Sam Parker

Solitude ain’t lonely
it’s just alone
No need for company
no need for phone
No need for acceptance
no need to fit in
No need for the games
when you’ve no need to win

Solitude ain’t lonely
when you just need some air
It doesn’t mean you’re not friendly
It doesn’t mean you don’t care
It’s a private little journey
that no one else can share
Solitude ain’t lonely
When you choose to go there

Different
E. Sam Parker

Not the same – not even close
Perhaps that is what I enjoy most
Eye-to-eye and heart-to-heart
And yet so different right from the start
Different tastes and different styles
Different thoughts, yet, all the while…
Loving

It makes no sense, we both agree
Me loving you, you loving me
And yet it’s right where we both should be
It’s where we both belong
Loving

What Then
E. Sam Parker

When the love stops, what then
When you’ve reached the point
You can no longer pretend
When the love of your life
is no more than a friend,
what then







When the dreams fade
When the colors all turn gray
When you mumble and stumble
for the right words to say
When daydreams become
your only way out
When you're so full of resentment
so full of self-doubt
What then

Where do you go
What do you say
When right before your eyes
You realize
it’s all gone astray

It’s all gone astray
Come apart at the seams
A pocket full of empty promises
a heart full of broken dreams
What then

Turn the page
Make a choice
Find a new song
Find a new voice
Take control and patch the hole
where your dreams
were falling through
A brand new start
can mend a broken heart
It’s true
It’s up to you

Special Moment
E. Sam Parker

I did not see it coming
I guess no one really could
They both seemed so very happy
Everything seemed as it should

Every detail well attended
I’s were dotted, T’s were crossed
It was a moment to remember
A total disregard for cost







All the families had gathered
Sitting to the left and right
It was a beautiful occasion
A prenuptial delight

They stood before the alter
The room was all a glow
She said yes, till death do us part
He said,
sorry,
no

The Ticks and the Tocks
E Sam Parker

Now I lay me down to sleep
I only wish I could
I toss and turn
and turn and toss
it doesn’t do no good
Every night the questions haunt me
the answers locked inside a box
Still I search on for the answers
among the ticks
among the tocks

The ticks and the tocks
keep on coming
but the answers never do
I keep searching for answers
that died along with you
So many questions
so many things
I’ll never know
The ticks and the tocks
every night
move so slow

Ticks and tocks
keep moving forward
and I know that I should too
My mind is full of questions
yet there’s nothing I can do
The answers rest forever
with you inside a box
All I have are questions
and the ticks
and the tocks

I know I need to move on
and I do the best I can
Still so many questions
things I’ll never understand
I lay there
eyes wide open
staring at the clock
Sleepless and searching
among the ticks
and the tocks
No Reget, Yet
E. Sam Parker

Think twice before acting
years may change your song
What sounds so good right now
might just suck later on







Maybe not now
but I’m willing to bet
There will come a time
you're going to regret
For now you feel cool
the ink is still wet
You’ve got no regret
yet

You can change your hair
change your perfume
Change your clothes
even change your room
Years from now
when the cool is gone
The ink will still carry on
and on, and on

How you feel at 20
isn’t going to last
When you are older
you’ll look back on your past
What was I thinking
why did I do it
I could have bought a picture
instead of having to live through it

You will tire of your hair style
and tire of your clothes
You’ll tire of the diamond
you stuck in your nose
You will tire of the fashion
and change your style
Probably tire of your apartment
and move after a while
You’ll no doubt change your car
as the years roll along
But the tattoos you had to have
will go on and on
and on

What’s cool at 20
won’t be cool years from now
You’re gonna look back
and wonder
how
How could I have done this
what was I thinking
you’ll blame it on youth
probably blame it on drinking

I’m not talking one or two
statically placed
I’m talking ink up your neck
and ink all across your face
Just like the spacers
placed into your ears
Regret will come
along with years

jusayin

Two Rights
E. Sam Parker

You say it’s over
you wanna come back home
Had enough of being on your own
you wanna make things right

You say it’s over and done
he really wasn’t the one
You were just a notch on his gun
and you wanna make things right

Well, two rights
haven’t turned out all wrong
You were right to leave
and I’m all right now you’re gone
You moved out
and I’ve moved on
Two rights
haven’t turned out wrong

There’s no spark
there’s no fire
I have no more desire
You were right to walk away
and I was right to let you
There’s no smoke
there’s no flame
you moved on
I did the same
You left
and now we’re both right

Two Rights
Written & Performed by Sam Parker

The Last Shot Fired
E. Sam Parker












When the lines were drawn
we were full of brawn
both eager for a fight
Two wrongs convinced
each, the only right

The battle raged
we both aged
the lines began to blur
We knew we were still angry
the reason though unsure

Out of control
war took its toll
Pride now the only prize
Then the truth of our ignorance
hit me right between the eyes

You died.

The last shot fired fell silent
no more fighting, no more war
No answer to the question
what were we fighting for
The last shot fired was deadly
silently ripping me apart
When you fired the last shot
your silence broke my heart

Blink, Blink, Gone
                            E. Sam Parker                       

She’s gone
the little girl
I held so gently in my arms
Gone
the fragile child
and her newborn baby charms
Gone
the heartfelt smile
as you first learned how to walk
Gone
that magic moment
when you first learned how to talk
Gone now are Mickey Mouse,
the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus
Gone
the thousand questions
of who, and why, and cause
Gone
the school recitals
full of proud applause
blink, blink
Gone
Gone too those days of discovering boys
giving up the childish toys
Music fads I just called noise
blink, blink
Gone
It’s sad those days have all passed by
and yet when I look into your eyes
I still see the love and sweet surprise
reflection now in a woman’s eyes
still daddy’s little girl
I say sad but really, that’s not true
I’ve loved every moment of life with you
I treasure both the old and new,
where we’ve been, and where you’re going
Going, going, but not really gone
A different phase, but love goes on
blink, blink
The love goes on









Dedicated to my loving daughter,
Tina Louise Parker (Pendell)

M E N
E. Sam Parker3

Men don’t share
We don’t dare
Why, because we’re Men
It would be a sign of vulnerability
If we let someone else in







Men don’t share
Because we’re Men
We suck it up
We keep it in
We stand alone
Or at least pretend
Why, because we’re Men
Foolish, foolish, men

Her Hand
E. Sam Parker3








She placed her hand in mine
and I began to melt
A sensation like no other
like nothing ever felt
My heart, warmed with every beat  
My life, somehow, now, complete

Words cannot do justice
Nor can I express
The joy, the love, the emotion
Her life, my happiness

Her Mother and I made her
But she made our lives complete
Nothing ever tasted
Could ever be so sweet

My Sun
E. Sam Parker

My daughter looked up and asked me
Her question took me by surprise
I could see she needed an answer
from the want within her eyes

She asked,
Do you ever wish

I was your son

My heart sank for a moment
Then warmed with such a glow
I smiled and said, my daughter
,
There is something you should know

You are my sun, my moon and stars
You’re the brightest light I see
You are the best thing in my life
You’re everything to me

Yes, I wanted a little boy
But God gave us so much more
He gave us a special daughter
To love and to adore

You are my Sun, and like the sun
You are at the center of my world
I thank God each and every day
That he gave me a little girl

You truly are my Sun

For the Sun in my life, my daughter,
Tina Louise Parker

Another Place, Another Time
E. Sam Parker3

Another place, another time
would you feel the flame
would you taste the wine
Would you take a chance
or just walk away
Would you turn to me,
would you want to stay
Would you call me yours,
could I call you mine
In another place,
in another time

If you could start again,
a life brand new
Would you start again,
with someone new
If you could change it all,
what would you do
If you could start again,
a life, brand new
Now and then,
thoughts come to mind
of another place,
of another time

Thoughts of now
thoughts of then
Thoughts I’ll never share again
Thoughts of you,
still come to mind
of another place
another time

On lonely nights
do you think of when
Do I come to mind,
every now and then
Do you ever wonder,
do you ever dream
Things aren’t always
quite the way they seem
Do the colors fade
to shades of gray
Do the memories
ever go away

Thoughts of now
thoughts of then
Thoughts I’ll never share again
Thoughts of you,
still come to mind
of another place
another time


Another Place, Another Time
Written & Performed by Sam Parker

In The Dark
E. Sam Parker

It’s cold and dark inside my heart
darker still inside my mind
I go to places I can’t share
places others never find
A hateful place, a scary place
full of regret, full of despair
The other side of who I am
lives a man I dare not share
A black hole deep inside my soul
a journey without choice
The demon screams in silent rage
I am driven by the voice

Let me out, let me go
God, how did I get here
I’ve asked the question a thousand times
the answer, never clear

Some doors we do not open
some boxes, best kept closed
There are things about our lives
better no one ever knows
We all have a dark place
we all have another side
Most seem to control it
most take it all in stride

Wish I were so lucky
truth is, I have no control
It takes me when it wants me
pulling me deep into the hole
Leaving me alone
in the dark

I Should Have Cried
E. Sam Parker

I should have cried the day you died
but my tears had all run dry
For far too long, things were so wrong
though I never knew quite why
The love was dead, my heart had bled
there was nothing left to try
I wanted just to love you
but had long since forgotten why

Your heart went dark,

you growled and barked
and took a vicious bite
So much had changed,

lives rearranged
we were anything but right
The day you died, I really tried
to love you and forget
Perhaps years can heal

the hurt I feel,
though I’m clearly not there yet

I hope someday I can find a way
to leave it all behind
I should have cried the day you died
but that’s going to take

a long, long time

Wish I Knew Why
E. Sam Parker

Tell me, why’d you do it
why’d you’d feel the need
To open up that can of doubt
to plant that hurtful seed
Does it make you feel above the rest
does it make you feel clean
Do you do it because you really care
or because you’re really mean
Tell me why’d you do it

Tell me why’d you say that
did it need to be said
Was it something you couldn’t live with
you couldn’t bite your tongue instead
Did you really need to say it
was it the right thing to do
Did it make them feel better
or was it only meant for you
Won’t cha tell me why’d you say that

I’d like to understand
why you feel the need
To make you feel better
you like to see someone else bleed
Wish I knew why

Why is it you feel better
when someone else hurts
Can’t wait to pour salt in the wound
rub their face into the dirt
Can’t wait to spread a rumor
regardless of the price
So quick with I told you so
and all that free advice
Can you tell me why

I know that we all do it
at least from time to time
But it ought to be against the law
it ought to be a crime
If you can’t say something nice
don’t say anything at all
It’s hard to be big about it
when you’re acting so very small
Looking in the mirror, who is that I see
Is it really who I am, or who I want to be
I try to do the right thing
be the best that I can
But sometimes I still do things
I may never understand
Wish I knew why
wish I knew why
Now
And
Then
The
Voices
Win

Shared Secret
E. Sam Parker

She’s got a secret, he doesn’t know
Someone else stole her heart
a long, long time ago.

Yes, she loves him, and he loves her so
What you don’t know can’t hurt you
because she doesn’t know he knows

Sometimes she stares out the window
getting lost in her own thoughts
Thinking of the life she has
and perhaps the life she sought
She’s got a secret, he doesn’t know
Someone else stole her heart
a long, long time ago

She has a secret, he has one too
She doesn’t know, that he always knew

Found a box bound in ribbon,
full of letters she had saved
They spoke of love and happiness,
of the life they both craved
So full of love, so full of life
Letters from him, to my wife
Now she’s got her secret
and I’ve got one too

I told myself to stop reading,
close the box, just put it down
Then I found the letter,
saying his plane had gone down
He was serving overseas
and he never returned
Some secrets are for keeping,
though I wish I’d never learned
We All Have Reasons
E. Sam Parker

She’s got her head in the clouds
and her heart in her hands
Looking for answers

she’ll never understand
Still she sails upon the ocean
flies across the sky
Why, why

He keeps his eyes on the road
his hands on the wheel
He’s set a course for success
but forgot how it feels
He wants love and understanding
but can’t seem to fit them in
He tried it once but lost direction
says he’d like to try again
when, when

When is the right time
when are your ducks in a row
When will you find the answers
when will you know
Thousand questions of
who, what, why and when
It never ends, it never ends

We’ve all got reasons for success
reasons why we fail
Reasons why we dream of heaven
and why we all fear hell
Some share their darkest secrets
Some, will never tell
It’s just as well, it’s just as well

We’ve all got our reasons
All have a cross to bare
We’re all searching for answers
hoping there out there somewhere
The games we play, the life we live
The love we make, the love we give
We’ve all got our reasons

A Political Opinion
E. Sam Parker

How can you be so wrong
that you fail to see
My way is the right way
and the only way to be

Your position is so weak
clearly not strong like me
How can you be so wrong
so wrong as not to see

I agree there is a solution
it is obvious to see
All that is needed here
is for you to just agree

The world would be a better place
well, at least for me
If you’d simply stop your way of thinking
and just agree with me
My Latest............
This, That & The Other
Original Materials by
E. Sam Parker III